I dunno why I numbered the slap but I'm sure there will be more to follow.
Slap #1 is for my lack in prayer. i know that prayer works. i've seen it proved over and over again. i know that prayer is a means of communication with our awesome God. i know that prayer disciplines us and sets our eyes on GOD and not on ourselves. i know... these things. i thought i prayed a lot. i was purrrty sure i did. but it's never enough. we must "pray continually". always be in a mindset of prayer. and that's what i've been lacking.

but today, as i prayed with a suitemate of mine.. i was quite humbled by my lack in prayer and upset at the lack in prayer generally. that slap across the face made me realize that without prayer... the retreat for koinonia will not be as glorifying to God because we did not prepare ourselves spiritually; we will be blind to the workings of the Spirit; we will grow to rely on our puny selves than God's infinite self; ... it just sucks without prayer.

there should be... less talking, more prayer. haha. just kidding. actually not kidding. more time spent with God will lead to more productive time with people. constantly ask for humility and love because it doesn't come naturally. fervently ask for a repentant heart because we are sinners at the core and need to remind ourselves of the cross. wholeheartedly ask for discipline and perseverance because we need them to live this life. and courageously ask for confidence and wisdom so that we can go out into the world and proclaim the amazing truth that we all hold so dear in our hearts. See? and all of that will lead to amazing connections and relationships with people: humility and love will put others first. repentant heart will prevent us from seeing everyone as sinners and ourselves as "righteous". discipline and perseverance will encourage others to keep on fighting this fight. confidence and wisdom will be able to plant seeds, nurture souls, and win souls for God's kingdom ! How awesommmme is that.

so pray. it's as simple as that. all you gotta do is talk to God. you don't need fancy words. you don't need to wail and beat yourself up. if in your heart you truly desire to glorify Him... then your prayers are sincere.

try praying just five minutes.

holdup now...... that seems like FOREVERRR. well, yknow what? in five minutes, you can brush your teeth and wash your face and take out your contacts. that doesn't seem like forever. in five minutes, your computer will be turned on and you'll already have checked your first email. does that seem like forever? in five minutes you can make a peanut butter & jelly sandwich and put it in a ziploc bag. surely, that doesn't take all eternity. so ... five minutes is not forever.

i feel so refreshed. even when i walk into a prayer meeting dead tired.. i walk out energized and ready to conquer the world. almost true on the latter part. =) but what did happen is that the Spirit has renewed in me strength to go on. and that's the best feeling after prayer.