is this silly?
to cry over a midterm grade?
sounds like something i would've done in high school.
oh wait. i did do that in high school.
i can't believe that this midterm grade i received today is totally killing this week. and later i'm meeting w/ the professor (for HALF AN HOUR) and i'm deathly afraid that i'm going to break down crying in front of him. basically my paper was worthless. i didn't take enough time to process the information that i've been gathering and definitely didn't give enough time to write the paper. i only had one night! but i'll stop there with my excuses.
i really enjoy the class. it's a great subject and i probably will never have a chance to learn something this unique. and my biggest problem is translating passion into success. i don't want to believe that i'm just a mediocre, surface-level student. if there's passion in it, why can't i achieve higher heights?
today I studied John 3 with Lisa and in v30 it says that "He must become greater, I must become less". How TRUE it is right at this moment. My passion is getting in the way of my passion for Him. My passion is overshadowing the responsibilities I have as a student at this present time. I spend too much time fantasizing with my head in the clouds. Wake up! My passions are only so great b/c HE has installed it in me.
This week is going to be sssoooo difficult to get through. And there aren't even any exams! There are going to be lots of families coming in because high schools have their spring breaks starting soon. So the office will be jam packed with visitors. I have a pchem paper due on Thurs. and the last time I had to write a paper was first semester... LAST YEAR. More God. More power.

No it is not silly to cry about a grade. I cry about tons of silly things ALL the time lol. I'm a water faucet. I find it helpful to have SOME sort of emotional release...it's better than keeping it all pent up inside.
Jessica Chen said...God often gives me wake-up calls like that and the more of those I get, the more I realize that it's because God cares a LOT about me. Seriously, He must LOVE me a WHOLE LOT to do all that just so I'll wake up and pay attention. It is because of His infinte mercy and His boundless grace that He wants to make my path straight.
In the end, though it's not pleasant at the moment, it's something I'm actually very very grateful for.
So I hope all that was actually encouraging for you. I still hope that you can have a blessed week =)